A Sad Metamorphosis

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Quiz from Randi's blog.
07.26.04 (9:43 pm)   [edit]
1) Starting time: 10:20

2) Full Name: Nicole K. M.

3) Nicknames: Onna(chan)... Fuzzy.. Kitty.. Kat... Blondie..

4) School: Marquette High

5) Email: black_hole@arcticmail.com

6) Eyes: Blue-green

7) Hair: Blonde, curly. (Yes.. I've embraced the curly, but the war against the Fuzzies continues!!)

8.) Height: 5'5"

9) Siblings: One older brother, 19

10) Ever been cheated on: No

11)Ever missed school because it was raining: Yup! And damn proud.

14) Had an imaginary friend: Nu

16) Cried during a Flick: Normally no, but I few have ripped a few out of me. Like Titanic. That made me cry.

17)Had a crush on a teacher: No.... All my teachers are women or strange with a gray ponytail..

18) Ever thought of animated characters as hot?: ...Yah. You act as if thats bad. But theres quite a few (Kenshin... Kira... Setsuna, Duo Maxwell, Inu Yasha, Miroku.. etc)

19) Ever at anytime owned a 'New Kids On the Block album: No.

20) Ever prank called someone: ...No, I thought about it once though.

21) Been on stage: Yeah ^^;; Ballet recital in 3ed grade.

-----------------FAVORITE S-------------

22) Shampoo: Garnier Frutis.

23) Color: purple black and silver

24) Summer/Winter: Summer

25) Online: AIM- CtarlCtarl Reita

26) Lace, silk or satin?: SILK!!!

27) Like Anyone?: Nu

28) Who have you known the longest of your friends?: Randi, since I don't think Olivia counts any more.

29) Who's the loudest friend you have: Bill... definately Bill.

30) Who's the shyest friend you have: Randi, fer sure Randi. She won't like, even go up to a stranger

31) Who do you go to for advice: Nobody.. I give it, normally. Cause I'm special ^_^ And dont listen.

32) Who do you get along with: Shawn, Andy, Randi, Natalie, Tom M., generally Bill, David,... M internet buddies. I can be CIVIL to anyone, but I get along swimmingly with the above folks.

-----IN THE LAST 2 WEEKS HAVE YOU------

33) Cried: ...Yeah...

34) Been mean: Yup. Mom got it. Bitch deserved it.

36) Been sarcastic: I'm sure

37) Met someone new: Yeah, David's fling/girlfriend, Courtney. I like her ^^ Shes crazy, like me.

38) Talked to someone you have a crush on? No crush to talk to.

39) Missed someone: Yes

40) Hugged someone: Yes

41) Fought with your parent(s): Yah

42) Wished upon a star: I gave that up when it stopped working... But I still chuck coins into fountains.

43) Laughed until you've cried: No, but I've laughed my ass off and enjoyed it..

44) Played Truth or Dare: No

45) Watched a sunrise/sunset: Sort of... I stayed up with friends past the sunrise, but we didn't *watch* it.

46) Went to the beach at night: Yes, I have.. Just not in the last two weeks ^^;; In the last two years I have..

47) Read a book for fun: Yus ^^

49) Been lonely: Yah

50) Been happy: Yeah

51) Been talking to someone online: Yeah, every night.

-----------DO YOU BELIEVE IN ----------

52) God/Devil: Nope. God can bite me and the Devil can go fuck a flagpole

53) Love: yeah, I s'pose.

54) The Closet Monster: . Its a battle to keep that damn monster in there very night!! Its an epic battle, with swords and cannons and flying cats.. Wait. That was a dream ^^ No closet monster.

55) The Big Bang Theory: Yeah

56) Heaven/hell: No, even though I still use phrases such as "Go to hell!" and the like.

57) Superstitions: Not many. But the thing about a penny? S'true!!

----------Random Crap---------

59) Who named you?: My mom, I'd imange.

60) Backstreet Boys or N Sync: Both suck.

61) When was the last time you showered: Yesterday.

62) What was the last thing you said when u were online?: eh?

64) What is your computer desk made of: Antique Cherry wood (My Great-grandmothers)

65) What was the last thing that you did today? took a nap?

67) Where would you want to go on your honeymoon? Don't plan on having a honey moon.

68) Who do you want to spend the rest of your life with: My buddies and my sanity! (if I lost that, I'd cry)

69) How's the weather: Hot, humis.. perfect!

70) What did you do yesterday/today: Yesterday: Hung out with friends.

71) Things that you find attractive about the opposite sex : Eyes, height, muscle tone/amount.

72) How do YOU eat an Oreo: Actaully, I'd rather have a Reices cup. And I eat those in three bites ^^.

73) All time favorite TV show: ...Xena, Buffy... Inu Yasha, Gundam Wing.. Stuff such as.

74) Dream car: 1960 Black with golden bird Trans AM, with the big 400 Engine.

75) What do you want to be when you grow up: ..zookeeper or worker at a Cougar sanctuary.

78) Number: 3 and 13.

79) Favorite food: pizza. ^^ Cliche, but true.

80) Favorite days of the week: Saturday.

83) If you could change your name, what would it be: Alexia or maybe Rose.

84) Do you sleep with a stuffed animal: No, then fall off ;.;

85) The most stupid thing u ever done: Too many things I've done count as Stupid to answer this.

86) First Son's name: No kids!

88) First daughter: I dont want kids.

89) Favorite drink: Mountain Dew, of the LiveWire varity.

90) You like scary or funny movies better?: Scary!!

91) On the phone or in person: Depends.. Breaking up, phone, talking to people in general, person

92) Lust or Love: Love

93) If you could change something about yourself what would it be: fix the bad teeth, no hair fuzzies, an inch or two taller.. About it.

94) Do you consider cheerleading a sport: Yes.. They've got to be skinny (not nessicarily fit) and it requires a bunch of practice and not everyone can do it.

95) Do you have pets: A dog and cat. (Used to have birds to, but the cat ate em )

96) Who sent this survey to you: Found it in Randi's blog.

97) What do you think of this person: ^_^ \// My best Buddah! Shes sweet natured, yet bitchy when need be. Shes stubborn,

98) What is your favorite type of music: Techno, but Alt. rock is great too

99) Anything you want to say: Nyo.

100) Time finished: 10:45
 
Introspection (probably looking to deep)
07.17.04 (4:53 am)   [edit]
I was surprised to find out tonight that I am afraid of comitments.. I did not know that. Hm... Will elaborate on this in depth later, when I'm coherant.

-12 hours later -

Okay, so i'm coherant enough to write. ^_^ Yay. So yeah, I was talking with one of my guy friends that I met over the internet and somehow it landed on the story of a ring that he wears on a necklace. It was his best friends engagement ring before she died. I was like, thats sweet but still sad. Cause his friend died of cancer, but he still keeps the ring, and intends to give it to a girl that he either wants to marry or really loves.

Long story short, he tried to "give" it to me. (No not mail it... Give it in an idea sense.. fuck, I know what I mean anyway) This freaked the crap out of me. Not because it was a guy I'd never met face to face with before, but because the whole idea of a ring. And after a little more soul searching, I found it wasn't just one from him, but anyone. I am afraid that I'll hurt the guy, or that he'll hurt me. Its not an easy thing for me to open up, in fact, I'm a very well controlled person. So much so, that I won't allow myself to cry and I think I sound like a complete imbecile when I admit even the smallest of my problems.

Okay, off that ramble and back to the topic. Point being, I found from this whole ring incident that not only do I not want to get married (ever) but I'm actually flinching away from potential hurt and simply turning my extremely thick and tough shell to it. ^_^ Thats all... Just a short rambling and rather idiotic blog. yes I know I sound whiney.. But I don't really care at the moment. Though this entry is subject to deletion as soon as I begin to care. So read fast.